Grandmother's Love???
Kids came over for their birthday. Trying to get everyone together at once is enough to add to my gray hair!! Anyway, two sons went to lunch with us. One went home to get ready to see his girlfriend, the other came home and waited for his sister whom he shares this day with. They are not twins they are five years apart. My daughter finally showed up and so did the youngest with the new baby. As well as some friends of my husband's. All in all, it was good except....
Yeah, I know, there is always a glitch. My youngest daughter asked this lady friend how her grandaughter is. Said grandaughter used to come visit in the summer and she and my daughter were attatched at the hips. The young lady is apparently in college, working and wanting to be a second grade teacher. This is so wonderful.. right? But then the grandmother went on about how the grandaughter has gotten fat. Eats out of boredom or something.. this lady even puffed her cheeks out to make the point. She had more to say about this girl and her weight. Now, you might say it's none of my business and I tried to treat it as such.
But, I watched my daughter whom has bordered off and on with trying to be as skinny as she possibly can .. listen to this lady she had always admired speak. I was beginning to get worried about the effect the conversation would have on my daughter but worse, I was appalled that she'd speak of her grandaughter this way. Three good sentences and the rest not even out of concern for her weight and it's affects on the girl's health but that she didn't apparently look the way the lady thought the girl should look. Is she overweight? Probably not. She probably weighs over 125 pounds. I couldn't take anymore... now it was beyond the effect on my daughter and now it was just sickening to me.
From my side of the room came, "She's such an adorable girl!" Do you think the lady would grasp the idea? Oh..nooo... she replied with a yes, adorable but fat. So, I got louder in my statement that she is adorable and wonderful and I received a dirty look but the subject changed. The whole time this lady is talking this way about her own grandaughter she's holding my newest grandson like he's one of her own. I got to hold him for about two minutes. My grandchildren are the greatest. I can't imagine finding fault with their weight.
It's sad.. just sad that this lady is the way she is because this girl used to come every summer to spend time with them and I know she didn't last summer because of this. And.. uhm.. she wasn't overweight. She weighed more than 100 pounds but she's beautiful! My daughter has clearly been influenced by this too. If I ever doubted where she got the idea of a need to be so skinny her face wrinkles I have today put that to rest. I should have been concerned when it upset the lady that my daughter had become taller than her and she couldn't dress this little girl in the woman's grown up clothes and make-up to make her look pretty.
Dammit.. she's a beautiful girl! (If I may say so myself.) She doesn't need to look thirty when she's 10 years old. Weight shouldn't be an issue unless it's a health hazzard.. Grandma should simply love her grandaughter unconditionally and be proud of her. If you can't ... quit influencing the girls.
Just... venting.
